


No Time

by Grinder1833



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Episode Tag, Episode: s14e10 Nihilism, Episode: s14e11 Damaged Goods, Established Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester, Established Relationship, M/M, Rimming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-10-17 22:02:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17568755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grinder1833/pseuds/Grinder1833
Summary: Saying goodbye is never easy.





	No Time

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own these characters. They are the property of “Supernatural,” Warner Bros. Television and Kripke Enterprises.
> 
> A/N: I'm not sure how much time has passed between episodes 10 and 11. I used my best guess and what worked best for this story. 
> 
> Un-beta’d. All mistakes are my own.

Dean shoved the black book inside his underwear drawer, burying it beneath his boxer briefs. Its contents—well, he didn’t want to think about what he’d just read. He needed a fucking drink. 

Now.

He headed toward the library, which was thankfully deserted. Even after a few months, running into random people in his home was disconcerting. He was convinced he’d never get used to all those strangers roaming around. The bunker was his and Sammy’s home. He was most comfortable when it was just him and Sammy. 

At least the war room didn’t look like a war zone anymore. Madelyn. No, Margie. Dean shook his head. That wasn’t her name. 

_What the fuck **was** her name?_

At this point it didn’t matter. 

Dean stopped at the bar cart in the corner of the room and poured a much-needed glass of whiskey. 

He took a drink, the liquid burning its way down his throat. Please, let it burn away what he’d read in that damn book. 

“Dean!” Sam’s voice interrupted his thought. 

“Heya, Sammy.” Dean took another drink. He wasn’t ready to face his brother yet. Not after what he’d just read. Sam couldn’t know. 

“You okay?” Sam slowly approached him. Maybe he sensed Dean was ready to bolt. 

Dean licked his alcohol-stained lips. “Are we alone?” 

“I think so. Cas took Jack out for some air. The kid was kinda freaked by his sudden burst of mojo.” 

“What about the rest of the Scooby gang?”

“Maggie decided to take them on a sweep of the area just to make sure there aren’t any of Michael’s monsters around.”

_Maggie! That’s her name!_

Dean finished off the rest of the whiskey. He wanted to refill the glass, but then Sam would realize he definitely wasn’t okay. “They’re coming, they’re going. They’re here and then they’re not. Are we running a fucking hotel?” 

“Do you want me to kick everyone out?”

Dean closed his eyes. Sam would do it if he asked, but it was pointless now. Sam would need those people as well as Mom, Cas, and Jack after he was gone. “No, sorry. It’s just been a fucked up day.” 

“Yeah,” Sam quietly replied. “How are you doing, Dean?” 

He shrugged. “Just getting a drink—a real drink. I need one after all that fake tequila in Michael’s version of Margaritaville.”

“I thought the bar was called Rocky’s.” 

“Does it really matter?” 

“Suppose not.” 

“How long was I gone?” Dean asked. 

“A day—maybe even less,” Sam replied. “I wasn’t exactly checking my watch. We captured Michael pretty quickly.”

“But not quickly enough,” Dean concluded. 

Sam pulled out his damn puppy dog eyes. “Dean, don’t.” 

“What did he do?” 

Sam sighed. “He unleashed his army before we were able to get him the angel cuffs on him.” 

Dean wiped his hand over his face. _Fuck._ The death toll had to have been high. And it was on him. There was no other choice. He would have to follow the scenario laid out in the book Billy had given him. He couldn’t risk burning down the world that he and Sam had fought so hard to save.

Sam placed his hands on Dean’s shoulders. “It wasn’t your fault. It was Michael, not you.”

Dean pulled away. “I need another drink.” He poured another glass of whiskey and then did the same for Sam. One last drink together. “Here.” He handed Sam the crystal rocks glass. “You earned this. Thanks for saving me.” 

Sam took a sip. “Cas and Jack helped.”

“You knew the safe word. You know me better than anyone.”

“Saving each other is what we do.”

Dean was overcome with his love for Sam. Leaving him would be the hardest part. Losing Sam would be like losing his soul, which made sense with Sam being his soul mate and all. 

Dean gazed into Sam’s concerned eyes. One more time. He couldn’t leave Sam without kissing me, touching him, and fucking him. He polished off the rest of the whiskey and set his glass on the bar cart. “You know what I’d like to do,” he said in a low husky voice as he hooked his fingers through the belt loops on Sam’s jeans, tugging him closer.

Sam drained his whiskey, wincing once the glass was empty. Dean took it from him and placed it next to his glass. 

“What?” Sam licked his lips.

“If this place wasn’t Grand Fucking Central Station, I’d take you right here on our table,” he said. “Our” table was the one they’d carved their initials into to mark their legacy. 

“Dean.” Sam’s breath hitched.

“I want nothing more than to crawl up inside you and never leave.” 

Sam was on him the moment Dean had finished the sentence, crowding all up into his space and kissing him. “Do it,” Sam murmured between kisses. 

“My room.” He released his hold on Sam.

They wasted no time locking themselves away in Dean’s room. Dean frantically unbuttoned Sam’s shirt tugging it from his body followed by his T-shirt. He ran his hands over Sam’s bare chest, seeking out his tattoo. Sam will be safe. He’s the smartest person Dean knows. He’d still have Mom. Sam wouldn’t be alone. 

“Dean, please.”

Dean looked up at him, cocking his head. “Please what?” 

“Kiss me, fuck me—just stop teasing me,” Sam groaned.

“Let’s move this to the bed,” he suggested, taking a step back from Sam. He tugged his Henley and tossed it onto the floor. 

Sam shed the rest of his clothes while Dean followed suit. After he stepped out of his underwear, Dean grabbed the lube and a condom from the nightstand. Sam sprawled out on the mattress with his fingers laced behind his head, waiting patiently for Dean. He tossed the supplies next to Sam and then joined him on the bed. 

“Are you going to make good on your promise?” Sam asked.

“Which one?”

“Where you crawl up inside me.”

“C’mere,” he murmured, drawing Sam into a deep kiss and carding his fingers through Sam’s hair. Sam groaned into the kiss, pulling Dean flush against him. He felt Sam’s cock pressed against his stomach, hard and leaking. 

Dean wanted to lick the precome from the tip, take him deep, and drag his tongue along the shaft. He longed to be able to take the time to burn every inch of Sam’s body into his brain. He wanted to remember how his skin felt and tasted but he was afraid if he did then he wouldn’t be able to go through with his plan. Billie gave him a way to ensure Michael wouldn’t burn the world to the ground. Dean had to execute it. He refused to be responsible for another death of an innocent human. 

Without breaking their kiss, Dean reached for the lube. He wanted to fuck Sam but he didn’t want to stop kissing him. These last kisses were precious. Soon the memory of Sam’s lips against his would be all he’d have. Once he was positive he’d never forget the taste of Sam’s kisses, he lifted his mouth. 

“You ready to do this?” Dean asked, fighting to keep all the emotions he felt out of his voice. Sam couldn’t figure out that this would be their last time together. He needed to believe this was one of their typical post-hunt fucks. 

“Hell yeah.”

Dean grabbed the condom, ripped the wrapper open with his teeth, and rolled it onto his cock. He slicked up his dick with the lube. Sam started to roll over onto his stomach. “Don’t. I’m in the mood to see your stupid face tonight.” He kept his voice light and teasing. Humor in the face of despair was what he did best. 

Sam huffed out a laugh. “You’re such a romantic.”

“Nothing but hearts and flowers with me, Sammy.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Shut up and fuck me, Dean.”

“Gladly.”  
And fucked him he did. 

Dean cataloged everything. Each thrust. Every moan. The tightness. The salty taste of the sweat on Sam’s chest and neck. The way Sam’s chest hair tickled Dean’s nose. Sam’s fingers digging into Dean’s back. The slap of flesh meeting flesh. The pure ecstasy on Sam’s face. 

Dean blinked back the tears. Sam couldn’t see him about to lose his shit. Thankfully, his brother’s eyes were closed. He didn’t want to shut his though. The need to see Sam was too great because soon…

“Dean,” Sam groaned. 

Dean wrapped his hand around Sam’s dick. “I got you,” he said, stroking it. “I’ve always got you, Sammy.” He continued to fuck Sam while he jacked his cock, determined to get Sam off before him. 

Hours later. Okay, not hours, but Dean would like to think they lasted all night, putting off the inevitable. Sam came, shuddering and shooting all over his stomach and Dean’s hand. Sam opened his eyes, gazing up at him so happy and content. 

Fuck.

Dean squeezed his eyes shut as he came, his hips stuttering while the waves of pleasure washed over him. He’d never feel like this again. Never. Overcome with emotion and exhaustion, he collapsed on Sam’s chest. 

“Damn,” he breathed as Sam caressed his back. For a split second, all the horrors ahead of him vanished. It was just him and Sam. Safe. 

“Yeah.” 

“Don’t wanna move,” he mumbled into Sam’s chest.

“You don’t have to. You said you wanted to stay inside me forever.”

Dean closed his eyes. If only it were that simple. He didn’t want to leave Sam. Not now. Not ever. But he didn’t have a choice. 

“You know,” Sam said quietly. “We’ll figure out a way to get rid of Michael. You and me. Together.”

_No, we won’t, Sammy_.

********

****

**_One week later…_**

Dean was going to just leave him. No goodbye. Nothing. This knowledge cut him to the core. Gutted him. He thought they were beyond the secrets and lies. Sam didn’t even want to begin to think about the horrific plan that would have Dean to be locked in the Ma’lak box with Michael at the bottom of the Pacific.

“So… you came out here to see Donna, to see Mom on some—some what? Some sick, secret farewell tour? You were gonna leave, and you weren’t even gonna tell me. _Me._ Do you realize how messed up that is, how unfair that is?” Sam didn’t bother to hide the betrayal he felt. Let Dean see how his selfish choice had hurt him. 

“I didn’t have a choice! Sam, you’re the last person I could tell, the last person I could be around, ‘cause you’re the only one that could’ve talked me out of it. And I won’t be talked out of it. I won’t. I’m doing this. Now, you can either let me do it alone… or you could help me. But I’m doing this.”

_No, no, no._

Sam couldn’t. No, he wouldn’t let Dean go through with it. How could Dean think that he would remotely be okay with having him trapped with Michael for eternity? Sam shook his head, turning away unable to see the sheer determination on Dean’s face. He wouldn’t be able to change his mind right now. There was only for choice. 

Sam glanced back at the metal box and nodded. “All right.” 

He’d go along with Dean’s plan—for now. 

Sam would find another way. He’d sink down into the ocean with Dean before he allowed Dean to go alone. 

“All right?” Dean asked warily. 

Of course Dean wouldn’t believe that Sam would just hop on board with his plan. 

“What choice do I have?” 

Dean clapped his hands together. “All right! We need to find a boat captained by someone with questionable scruples and a love for money.”

Sam held up his hands. “Can we take a breath here? It’s the middle of the night.” He took a shaky breath. “And I want my proper goodbye.” 

“We’re not exactly alone here, Sammy, and the cabin only has one bedroom.”

Right. He’d think of something to tell their mother. They needed this night together. 

“I’ll talk to her.” 

“And tell her what exactly? That her sons to find a quiet place for a goodbye fuck?” Dean shook his head. “It’s a good thing that I’m going to be locked away. I should never have—” 

“No, Dean.” Sam wasn’t about to let him finish that sentence. “We are long past this incest guilt. You never made me do anything I didn’t want to do. _I_ was the one who pursued you all those years ago. You’re not some kind of monster so please don’t try to taint what we have between us by saying so.” The tears Sam fought to control ever since Dean announced his plan finally gave way and spilled down his cheeks. 

“Fuck,” Dean muttered quickly moving to the other side of the Ma’lak box. He gathered Sam in his arms, squeezing him tight. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. I’m glad you had the balls to make the first move because I don’t regret one moment. I just don’t want Mom to hate me in the end.”

“She’s not going to hate you. Our secret will stay safe. Even if it didn’t, she’d never hate you, Dean.” Sam kissed Dean’s cheek  
.  
Dean patted Sam’s back before he let go. “Okay. Go talk to her.” 

“You better not run off on me while I’m gone.” 

“I won’t. We’re in this together now.”

Sam nodded and headed out of the shed. He found his mom in the cabin sitting at the kitchen table. 

“Did you talk some sense into him?” Mary asked.

Sam sat down at the kitchen table. “I’m trying, but he’s being stubborn.” 

“Maybe I should talk to him.”

“We don’t want him to feel ganged up on,” Sam said. “I should be able to get him to change his mind but I need some time.” 

“Do you want me to leave you two alone?”

“I don’t want to kick you out of the cabin. We can find a motel.” 

“Don’t be silly.” Mary rubbed his arm. “I can head into town to make sure Donna isn’t having any trouble with Nick. I’m sure she’ll let me spend the night at her place.”

“But it’s the middle of the night.”

“Sam, you ought to know by now that I’m not some helpless damsel in distress.” 

“You’re right.” Sam felt bad about kicking his mom out but he needed this night with Dean. He didn’t want to contemplate that it could be the last time they made love. 

“Give me a few minutes to pack a bag.” Mary stood up and headed toward the staircase.

“I better get back to him.” 

“Good luck, Sam. Please call me if you need anything.” 

“Will do.”

********

Dean plopped down onto the sofa. “I can’t believe you sent Mom away.”

“It was her idea. I offered for us to go to a motel,” Sam replied. “I think it’s a good thing that she makes sure that Nick is locked up. Mom has proven that she knows how to take care of herself. She’ll be back in the morning. She promised to bring donuts.” He straddled Deans lap. Time to get his mind on other things. 

Dean gave him a lazy smile. “Awesome. I hope she gets the kind with the creamy center.” He ran his hands over Sam’s back. “You know you’re too big to be a lap dog, bitch.”

“Jerk.” Sam kissed Dean before he could come up with a witty remark. He didn’t want to think how much he’s miss Dean’s dumb comments and their playful banter. 

Dean cupped his ass. “Fuck me.”

“Here?”

“The couch is supposed to fold out.”

“Do you really want to risk getting caught in the morning?” Sam asked, purposely leaving the word “mom” out of the equation. He didn’t want anything to kill the mood.

“Our other option is the bedroom where…” Dean let the sentence trail off so Sam could fill in his own blanks. 

Fucking his brother in the same bed where their mom and Bobby probably bumped uglies wasn’t a better option. They’d have to worry about changing the sheets before she returned. “The fold out is probably the lesser of two evils. We’ll just have to make sure we’re all cleaned up first thing in the morning.”

“Okay, get off me, Sasquatch.” Dean smacked Sam’s ass.

Sam stood up and helped Dean set up the sofa bed. He found a set of clean sheets to put on the thin mattress along with an old quilt. 

“Time to start fucking,” Dean announced after making sure all of the cabin doors were locked.

Sam shook his head while he rummaged through his duffle. He found the lube but there weren’t any condoms. Then he remembered they used the last of his supply after they stopped at a motel on their way home from Ohio and celebrated their defeat of Hatchet Man aka the ghost of Jordan MacNeel. 

“Fuck.” 

“What is it?” Dean stood beside the sofa bed stripped down to his black boxer briefs. 

“I don’t have any condoms. Please tell me that you do.” 

“I didn’t exactly pack for a sexy romantic getaway.” 

“Don’t you have one in your wallet?” 

“I used that when we had that quickie a few weeks back.” 

Sam remembered the night well. Dean had felt cooped up and claustrophobic with all of the new people in the bunker so they went for a drive, found a bar about an hour away, drank and shot pool. Watching Dean draping himself over the pool table all night had made Sam incredibly horny so he begged Dean to fuck him in the back alley of the bar. 

“Fuck.” Why did the universe hate him? Now wasn’t the time to be out of condoms. 

“That’s what we’ll be doing if you ever take off your clothes. Hop to, Sammy. We have a bit of a time constraint.”

“We don’t have any condoms.”

Dean shrugged. “So don’t use one when you fuck me.”

Sam gapped at him. Dean had drilled the importance of safe sex into him ever since Sam learned what his dick was for. “I can’t.”

Dean raised an eyebrow. “Is there something you’re not telling me?” 

“No, I’ve always used one. Well, except after Jess and I became exclusive but she was the only one.” 

“I’ve always used them. And I can’t remember the last time I was with anyone but you. Have you been with anyone since that diner chick? What was her name? Melody? Harmony?” 

“It was Piper. She was the last one.” 

“Problem solved.” Dean grinned. “Now, stop yapping and get naked.” Sam tossed the lube onto the mattress and started peeling off all his layers of clothes until he was naked. “That’s more like it,” Dean told him. He removed his underwear and hopped on the bed. “Let the loving begin.”

Sam appreciated that Dean was trying to keep the mood light. He’d rather not think of the gravity of their situation. This wouldn’t be the first “last fuck of their lives.” They’ve had more than their fair share over the years. Sam always ended up wrecked by the end. Tonight wouldn’t be any different no matter how hard he tried to be strong.

Sam crawled onto the bed and stretched out next to Dean. He opened his mouth to say something, but Dean kissed him silent before he could speak. “Enough talking,” Dean said when they parted. “More of the fun stuff.” 

Right. 

Sam bathed Dean’s chest with licks and kisses, stopping to pay homage to Dean’s tattoo and sensitive pebbled nipples. Sam always got an extra loud moan when he licked or sucked them. He knew Dean would never admit it aloud (can’t be too girly) how much he enjoyed it when Sam did this. 

“Turn over,” Sam said.

“I wanna see you.”

“I wanna see your ass.”

“You kinky bastard.” Dean happily rolled over onto his stomach.

Sam found it amusing that Dean acted as if Sam hadn’t rimmed him a fuckload of times before this. He dragged his tongue down Dean’s crack, enjoying how he could make Dean shudder. The need to claim and possess overcame him. If he was really going to lose Dean forever, Sam wanted to send his mark with him. 

“Dude, are you giving me a hickey on my ass?” Dean murmured as Sam nipped and sucked one of Dean’s ass cheeks. Sam gently smacked Dean’s butt. “Damn” he drawled. “You are a freak in the sheets.”

Satisfied with the mark, Sam moved to Dean’s hole. He swiped his tongue along the tight pucker. Dean’s gasps and moans were music to Sam’s ears. His brother needed pleasure. Love. 

All of the agony in Dean’s mind nearly overwhelmed Sam while he was in there. So much loss. So much pain. Dean deserved to feel incredible after all the trauma he’s endured. Sam hoped Dean could finally accept and trust how much Sam loved him—every glorious inch of Dean. Scars and all. He was the most beautiful person in the entire world. And he was all Sam’s.

Until…

Sam squeezed his eyes shut. _No. Stay focused in the now, not what might be._

“Sammy, you gotta fuck me,” Dean panted. 

“Toss me the lube.” 

Dean reached next to him, snatched the tube, and threw it to Sam. While Sam coated his cock with lube, Dean rolled over onto his back and spread his legs wide. He took a moment to study Dean, to sear his beauty into his mind. Just in case.

No, I’ll save him.

Dean nudged Sam’s thigh with his foot. “Sammy, it’s not polite to keep a guy hanging. I thought I taught you better than that.”

Sam shook his head. He appreciated Dean’s use of humor to defuse the somberness of the moment. The smirk on Dean’s face vanished when Sam pushed inside him. Sam’s eyes rolled into the back of his head. Never in his life had he felt anything this incredible. He was inside Dean and there was nothing between them. Dean was so hot and tight. 

“Fuck,” Sam groaned.

“Feels awesome,” Dean breathed, wrapping his legs and Sam’s torso and digging his heels into Sam’s back. 

Sam nodded and then began to move. _Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._ He wasn’t going to last long.

“Why did we wait so long to do it this way?” Sam asked.

“The hell if I know,” Dean panted. “Fuck me hard. I wanna feel you forever.”

It would be hard and fast. Fucking Dean had always been amazing, but doing it raw took it to a whole new level. Sam gave him exactly what he wanted. He pounded into him, his balls slapping against Dean’s ass. The sofa bed thumped and rattled with each thrust. Sam prayed they wouldn’t break the damn thing. 

The entire time they kept their eyes locked together. Brothers. Lovers. Soulmates. Regardless of what their future held, Sam knew they’d always be one. He was so fucking close. Sam reached for Dean’s dick, but Dean batted it away.

“Just come, Sammy.” 

And he did, crying out, filling Dean with his hot release. Dean pulled him into a hungry kiss. Sam felt that Dean was still rock hard. He’d take care of him. Sam carefully pulled out. Instead of getting Dean off with his hand, Sam wrapped his mouth around Dean’s dick, dragging his tongue around the crown just the way Dean liked it—licking, sucking, and rubbing the shaft until Dean finally unloaded into Sam’s mouth. He savored every bit of come that he swallowed.

Fuck. This couldn’t be the last time. 

Sam didn’t bother holding back the tears any longer. “Sam Winchester cries his way through sex,” Sam sniffed. “Guess you knew what you were talking about after all.” 

“Sammy. Don’t.” Dean wiped a few tears from Sam’s cheek with his thumb. 

“I can’t lose you,” Sam’s voice cracked.

Dean peppered his face with kisses. “It’ll be okay, Sammy. You’ve done it before. You can do it again.”

“That didn’t go so well. I fucked a demon and drank her blood.”

“You have Mom.”

“But I want _you_ ,” Sam cried, not caring that he was falling apart. Dean needed to see how much he needed him. 

“You said you were going to help me. Don’t abandon me now.”

Sam. You know, Dean was his happiest when you quit hunting, leaving him with your dad, just the two of them. See, deep down, he knows that you will always abandon him, again and again.

Fucking Michael.

“Like I always do,” Sam said. 

Dean shook his head. “No! Don’t you dare think that! Michael twisted the truth. I wasn’t happiest when you were at Stanford. I was fucking miserable. I hated that you were gone.” He cupped Sam’s face with his hands. “I felt abandoned by you and, yeah, I’ve always lived with the fear that you’d leave me and one of those times you’d just stay gone.”

“I’ve told you that I’m not going anywhere. You and me. It will always be you and me.” Sam needed to make Dean understand that he’d never willingly leave him again. Never. 

“Then help me keep Michael locked up for good,” Dean hissed. He pulled away from Sam, digging the palms of his hand into his temples. “He’s not giving up. I’m trying so hard, Sammy, but I can feel the lock breaking.” 

Sam wrapped him into a hug, spooning up behind Dean. He wanted to shield Dean for the pain and give him strength to push forward. He’d fought his own battle with Lucifer. The sheer will and power it took him to gain control for a few minutes had required all Sam’s energy as well as the love of Dean.

“I know how difficult it is,” Sam told him. “Believe me, Dean, I know, but you can fight him a little longer. You can in control. You can lock it down. You’ve got this. You’re strong,” he breathed into Dean’s ear. “I’m not going anywhere. You and me. I’ve got you. Don’t stop fighting.” 

Dean let out a shuddering breath. “I won’t.”

“I’ll fight right by your side, right where I belong.” 

“Good.” Dean relaxed against him. 

Sam prayed for a miracle. He knew it was futile but he refused to give up all hope. 

“You have to promise me that you won’t pull a Padme after I’m gone and give up the will to live,” Dean said. 

Sam could hear the emotion masked by Dean’s false bravado. He dropped a kiss onto Dean’s shoulder. “I’ll try.” 

“There is no try.” 

“Okay,” Sam said just to appease Dean. It wouldn’t come to living without Dean. He’d die trying to save his brother.


End file.
